Saturday, October 22, 2011
Social Differences
Its hard being in college full of partiers when you are a straight edge 18 year old. Living in dorms and watching everyone stumble in drunk or high is a little difficult. And Im not going to lie...I feel a little left out at times. Its weird hanging out with your friends who tell drunken stories all the time and you have no clue what is going on. Don't get me wrong, my two best friends up here go out and I have no problem with the fact that they do like to party. Im always the person who is always willing to pick them up if they ever need a ride because I love my friends to death and never want anything bad to happen to them. But after countless nights of being one of probably 20 sober people at 12:20 AM, if not one of 20 people back in their room at this time, I began to think to myself and ponder the fact that I am choosing to not do these things because of my own personal values. And it does make me wonder if I will lose my friends or drift from them because I am not going out to parties with them. I want to be able to have the same amount of fun with them that they have with everyone else when they're drinking. And to me this is one of the thousands mysteries of life. I guess it is something that we will just have to wait and see, but I hope it all works out. I love diversity and love when I am able to be friends with a group of friends that aren't exactly like me. But I hope people feel the same about me.
Friday, October 21, 2011
Parental Control
What do you do when you "disobey" your parents, when you know its the right thing for you?
Well, this is the question of the year...honestly this all kills me. My life is in sorts right now, I know that getting baptized is what i truly want. But how can I face my parents at a time like this? Is it because my faith is little? Is it because I can't face their disappointment? Is it because I don't feel confident? These are questions that I constantly ask myself.
Why is it that everyone tries to put down your beliefs just because they are not the same as their's? Is it the abnormality of you making a positive change in your life? If there is one thing I wish my parents could understand...its that the church has made me such an incredible person. I have changed so much for the better in my life and I am truly happy, so why is it that they cant see that? I have countless sleepless nights worrying about how I will tell them and I still can't bring myself to doing it.
So I have decided to write them a letter. Writing is a way for me to have an outlet to my many problems. It helps me be able to interpret my feelings and emotions. I know that this is the only way I will be able to relay my message the way I want it to be told to them. I know that they cant belittle me and I am telling them what will happen. I know that this is the best way for me to let them know. And so my journey begins...
I know that there are hundreds, if not thousands, of converts out there with a story like mine...if not worse. And I am so grateful for them, I am so happy that they have chose to make an amazing decision in their life and that they made a positive change. I believe that people should be truly happy, it doesn't matter if you're LDS, Lutheran, Catholic, or Baptist. All that matters is that at the end of the day you are happy with yourself and you are happy with your actions. To me, that is the most important.
Well, this is the question of the year...honestly this all kills me. My life is in sorts right now, I know that getting baptized is what i truly want. But how can I face my parents at a time like this? Is it because my faith is little? Is it because I can't face their disappointment? Is it because I don't feel confident? These are questions that I constantly ask myself.
Why is it that everyone tries to put down your beliefs just because they are not the same as their's? Is it the abnormality of you making a positive change in your life? If there is one thing I wish my parents could understand...its that the church has made me such an incredible person. I have changed so much for the better in my life and I am truly happy, so why is it that they cant see that? I have countless sleepless nights worrying about how I will tell them and I still can't bring myself to doing it.
So I have decided to write them a letter. Writing is a way for me to have an outlet to my many problems. It helps me be able to interpret my feelings and emotions. I know that this is the only way I will be able to relay my message the way I want it to be told to them. I know that they cant belittle me and I am telling them what will happen. I know that this is the best way for me to let them know. And so my journey begins...
I know that there are hundreds, if not thousands, of converts out there with a story like mine...if not worse. And I am so grateful for them, I am so happy that they have chose to make an amazing decision in their life and that they made a positive change. I believe that people should be truly happy, it doesn't matter if you're LDS, Lutheran, Catholic, or Baptist. All that matters is that at the end of the day you are happy with yourself and you are happy with your actions. To me, that is the most important.
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